“I realized the power of being willing to listen. By opening up and sharing my own struggles, it created a safe space for her to open up about hers.”
I’m currently nine months pregnant, and throughout the past couple of months, I’ve been surprised to have multiple family members confide in me about their struggles during their own pregnancies and motherhood journeys. As they each shared their personal experiences, I couldn’t help but think about how important it is to be willing to listen.
Introducing Our Couple-Twins
My husband’s cousin and his wife got married two months before us, and their respective ages match ours. You could say we’re couple-twins—both husbands are finishing up school at around the same time, I’m having my first baby while they’re planning theirs, and we’ve hit a lot of the same milestones around the same time.
We’ve definitely become great friends over the past five years, and my husband and I feel super comfortable sharing anything with them.
Their Trial-Filled Journey
Our friends have definitely had some major struggles throughout their marriage. My husband’s cousin was diagnosed with cancer a couple of years after they got married, and while he’s cancer-free, he now has a prosthetic leg and faces physical limitations that he never did before.
Despite these struggles, my husband’s cousin and his wife are some of the happiest people I know. They constantly support each other, and you’ll never hear them complain about their struggles—instead, they’re more likely to crack a joke or two about them!
A Surprising Connection
After a game night with these friends a few weeks ago, I started discussing my pregnancy with our cousin’s wife. As they both know, I struggled with a PCOS diagnosis and had help from a fertility center to get pregnant.
While talking about the ups and downs of my pregnancy journey, she opened up and shared her and her husband’s struggles. They had just attended their own first appointment at a fertility center and didn’t receive great news.
I was taken aback—not because of the news, but because she felt comfortable enough to share such personal struggles with me. It made me realize just how important it is to be willing to listen to others without judgment or trying to “fix” their problems. She just needed someone to talk to and share her feelings with, and I was extremely grateful to be that person for her.
Another Unexpected Encounter
That experience reminded me of another conversation I had during my baby shower. One of our cousins is pretty private, and we often don’t hear many details about her life. However, as I opened up to her about my pregnancy, she shared some of the struggles of her own pregnancy and delivery.
I realized the power of being willing to listen. By opening up and sharing my own struggles, it created a safe space for her to open up about hers. We were able to connect and support each other in ways that we wouldn’t have been able to otherwise.
Build Then Bless Enters the Conversation
I’ve been thinking about my cousins a lot lately, and I really wanted to do something to help. I could remember the stress of my seemingly million fertility center appointments and how much time I spent figuring everything out. What could I do that would actually make a difference?
Then I remembered my Build Then Bless card. I hadn’t used my monthly funds yet, and I knew this was the perfect opportunity. I spent as much as possible on a DoorDash gift card and texted it to our cousin’s wife. I explained how I had been thinking about her and that hopefully, this would make their appointment days a little less stressful.
The Power of Listening and Genuine Support
It felt good to be able to help out in a small way, and it reminded me of the importance of listening and being there for others. If I wasn’t willing to listen, I wouldn’t have made those connections and offered genuinely helpful support. The Build Then Bless mindset truly goes beyond gift-giving—listening and being there for others is just as important.
